Saturday, August 2, 2014

Gratitude: Attempts at Understanding

Today, I am grateful for:

Understanding. It's not always in great supply, either from me or for me, but when it is present, much is solved.

In the past few days, I had someone tell me that associating with me would be impossible because of my alcoholic past. Seems this person knew a recovering alcoholic in the past--one with 20 years of sobriety--and that person slipped back into old behavior, causing a lot of pain. Of course, in this person's mind, I would do exactly the same thing.

What I must accept and understand here is that my past is not all gone. Sometimes it comes back to exact a little more revenge and the more gracious I am about the consequences, the less they hurt. I will have to pay for being an alcoholic all the days of my life, but my life in sobriety is so much better than it ever was before that I will simply be grateful for what I have--at whatever cost--and accept what others might feel about it.

I forgive the person who can't accept me and I have long since forgiven myself for my serious shortcomings when I was a drunk. I'm who I am now and that has to be good enough.

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