Oh, Newtie, You're Just a Funny, Funny Boy

Newtie's a real knee-slapper.

A website called "Addicting Info" has listed 18 quotes from Newt Gingrich that will give you a look at the inside a man of great Republican character ... or is that "another of those Republican characters"? (I threw in a few other quotes for good measure from a variety of sources.)

Here's some of what Gingrich, whom the Repubs consider an intellectual, has said in the past. God knows what he'll say today:

• “The problem isn’t too little money in political campaigns, but not enough.”
• “I have enormous personal ambition. I want to shift the entire planet. And I’m doing it. I am now a famous person. I represent real power.”
• “Gingrich – Primary mission, Advocate of civilization, Definer of civilization, Teacher of the rules of civilization, Leader of the civilizing forces.” (Newt on Newt.)
• “The most serious, systematic revolutionary of modern times.” (Newt on Newt II.)
• “It doesn’t matter what I do. People need to hear what I have to say. There’s no one else who can say what I can say. It doesn’t matter what I live.”
• “Now, we don’t get rid of it in round one because we don’t think that that’s politically smart, and we don’t think that’s the right way to go through a transition. But we believe it’s going to wither on the vine because we think people are voluntarily going to leave it — voluntarily.” (Newt on Medicare.)
• “She isn’t young enough or pretty enough to be the president’s wife.” (Newt on his first wife.)
• “It is tragic what we do in the poorest neighborhoods, entrapping children in child laws which are truly stupid … These schools should get rid of unionized janitors, have one master janitor, pay local students to take care of the school.” (Newt on how to get rid of unions.)
• “We should replace bilingual education with immersion in English so people learn the common language of the country and they learn the language of prosperity, not the language of living in a ghetto.” (Observation: A large percentage of those lobbying for a national language--English--neither speak nor write it as well as many of our immigrants and would be loath to pass the literacy test they want to give those immigrants.)
• "We should have two requirements for citizenship. You have to learn American history and pass a test about America, and you have to do it in English." (See note above.)
• “The left-wing Democrats will represent the party of total hedonism, total exhibitionism, total bizarreness, total weirdness, and the total right to cripple innocent people in the name of letting hooligans loose.” (Channeling his inner Rush Limbaugh.)
• “These people are sick. They are so consumed by their own power, by a Mussolini-like ego, that their willingness to run over normal human beings and to destroy honest institutions is unending.” (Channeling his inner Rush II.)
• “I think one of the great problems we have in the Republican party is that we don’t encourage you to be nasty. We encourage you to be neat, obedient, and loyal and faithful and all those Boy Scout words.” (Newt channeling his inner Karl Rove.)
• “More people are on food stamps today because of Obama's policies than ever in history." (Like so much Newtie says, this is not true. There were more people on food stamps during the Bush II administration, making him the Welfare President, if you will.)
• "Nazis don't have the right to put up a sign next to the Holocaust Museum in Washington. There is no reason for us to accept a mosque next to the World Trade Center."
• "The secular-socialist machine represents as great a threat to America as Nazi Germany or the Soviet Union once did."
• "Public Broadcasting is a sandbox for the rich. The NEA and the HEH are simply enclaves of the left using your money to propagandize your children against your values."

(Photo: nationalconfidential.com)