Thursday, November 10, 2011

What a Republican Virginia Will Look Like

Those of us who have been morbidly curious about what an all-Republican government would do given the chance can now look at Virginia for an answer. With the Senate swinging over to the Repubs (the official count right now is 20-20, but with Lt. Gov. Bill Bolling's vote, the Repubs have a majority), the House long in its hands, a Repub governor and a state Supreme Court that is to the right of John Birch, we'll see how the GOP governs.

My guess is we'll get some of the following:
  • A clamping down on abortion, which nearly doesn't exist in Virginia already. I'm looking for something similar to what Mississippi rejected yesterday, a law that makes birth control illegal.
  • A requirement that every citizen, regardless of age, background, physical and mental condition or national origin carry a concealed gun. At least one. Could go to two or three. Guns will be not only legal but encouraged in places like bars, church, school and work.
  • The coal industry, which has caused far more deaths than Aids, will have strong support as it knocks away mountaintops and pollutes the air.
  • Concern for the environment will be as out of date as leisure suits.
  • Poor children will go hungry and without medicine.
  • Rich people will get richer and pay even less tax than they pay now.
  • The gap between wealth and poverty, which is huge today, will double or triple over the next four years.
  • Roads and bridges, already crumbling under a 25-year austerity focus, will begin to disintegrate. I expect a Minneapolis-style catastrophe on one of our bridges any time now. Hope I'm not on it. Hope you're not, either.
  • The state will start sending federal funds back to Washington because the Repubs won't want to be told how to spend them.
  • More prisons will be built in a state that is overbuilt by about half.
  • Utility rates will wind up on the moon.
  • Cities will be on their own, though the mandates will not slow down.
  • All bare breasts on state statuary will be covered.
  • Bible Study will be a required high school course.
  • Cigarettes will make a strong comeback among kids.
  • Oil derricks will appear off the Virginia coast in huge numbers and we'll have a major oil spill within 10 years of their appearance.
And there'll be plenty more that we haven't even imagined yet.

(Graphic: crowel.typepad.com)

1 comment:

  1. "The state will start sending federal funds back to Washington because the Repubs won't want to be told how to spend them."

    I find this statement interesting, but not unbelievable, given that the guv blew off funds for education. It just seems a bit ironic after McDonnell spent the summer and fall working to pry money from FEMA for tornado and earthquake victims. Big government is bad, except when it has money to hand out. I guess it's better to spend someone else's money instead of Virginia's money.

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