Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Gratitude: Anne Giles' Observations

Anne Giles
Today I am grateful for:

Anne Giles and her insights about her recovery from alcoholism.

Anne has been writing a blog (here) that I hope she will turn into a book soon. Her observations on her fall and subsequent rise are telling, meaningful and a deep learning experience for me.

Take, for example, this from today's post: "Do you want to be right or do you want to be close? ... Some people engage in conflict with me to get their one-up needs met by attempting to put me one-down and in the wrong. Some people engage in conflict with me to overcome a frustrating distance between us. I am getting better at discerning--or even asking directly about--the other person's motivation when initiating conflict."

That is a specific circumstance I have faced of late (and I have more than 20 years' sobriety, so it doesn't stop; in fact, it becomes far more complex the clearer our minds become) and I have felt like I was on an island with it. The constant drum of criticism--what I'm feeling--does not always equate with what is being said. It, like so much else, is a matter of interpretation--my interpretation.

This and many other insights make me grateful for my friend, Anne.

1 comment:

  1. This might give some additional insight into the differences between personalities that is often at the root of apparent conflicts: http://wp.me/p2Xa11-2sJ I found it very helpful in understanding my own motivations and how they can be intrusive to people of different personality types.